Helping Those Who Have Needs

My VT companion and I visited our sisters in August; I really enjoy going to their homes! Each of our sisters are different in their personalities. We talk about different things with them and I love to hear about them and their families and what is going on in their lives. We chat for a while and then, before we leave, we give each of our sisters a spiritual message.

The August message talked about helping our sisters when they have needs. At first I thought about how we take meals to people when they're sick or babysit their kids when they need it. But then it occurred to me that our sisters have more than just physical needs.

I think our sisters will never tell us when they have other needs because they don't want to appear weak or "needy." Our church teaches people to be self-reliant (which is good,) but when people are self-reliant they say they don't need anything because they believe in taking care of themselves. We're taught to rely on the Holy Ghost's promptings to tell us what our sisters need. It's good to rely on Him but, I wish our sisters would tell us, too.

I think differently than most LDS women because since I've been sick I've had to say what I need because I can't do it myself. I believe the people who serve me are glad that I say what I need because they want to show me, through their actions, that they care. Unless I say what I need, they won't help me because they won't want to impose.

I'm glad the people in my church have opportunities to serve each other. (They may think they are just doing their duty, but they are also doing two other things. First, they are showing how much they care. Second, they are being Christlike. They may think, I don't want to do this, but when they serve they get the chance to do something for someone other than themselves.)

Click here to read the August VT message.
Here's the handout we gave to our sisters.

Here's my letter to my sisters:

August 2012

Dear Sister,

The August VT message is about helping sisters when they have a need. The Church Handbook says: “In order to serve, we have a responsibility to be conscious of the needs of the sisters we visit. When we seek inspiration, we will know how to respond to the spiritual and temporal needs of each sister we are assigned to visit. Then, using our time, skills, talents, prayers of faith, and spiritual and emotional support, we can help give compassionate service during times of illness, death, and other special circumstances.”

Helping someone doesn't just mean babysitting their kids or bringing them dinner, but being in tune with the spirit to know the best kind of help a person needs. The best help comes through the spirit's prompting. The thing that helps a sister most is what she needs not what we want to give. (After all, how does it help her if it's not what she needs?)

In speaking for myself, obviously I don't have the ability to provide physical help, but I can provide things like emotional help, a listening ear, kind words, sympathy, and friendship. If my sister needs something that I can't do, either my companion can do it or we'll find a way to get it done.

It's hard to know what our sisters need because they act like they don't need anything. They appear to have it all together when we know they’re struggling. They may never tell us what their needs are, but the spirit will give us intuition to know what our sisters need when we put our trust in him.

The most important thing we can do is act on the promptings we receive. If we feel inspired to call her, send her a card, visit her, invite her to lunch, arrange to have dinner taken to her, or whatever, we need to do it. 

Let’s remember what we can do not what we can’t. When we do what we can, we will feel great love for our sisters and their families.

We love you.

Missionary Work

I have been called for a few months to be a Mission Prep Adviser. It has been my pleasure to hear the boys of my ward (who are mostly Andrew's age) teach me what they know about the gospel. The boys know the gospel, but it's one thing to know it and another thing to teach it. I have great faith in them that they will learn how to teach the gospel as well as how to relate to people. After all, they are teaching people not just lessons.

I think the church's missionary program is inspired. Missionaries are mostly young boys who have primarily thought of themselves. At 19 years old, just when they get freedom, they are expected to go somewhere in the world and serve others for two years. They grow up and become mature from the experience. They learn how to think of others. They learn how to live with a companion. Some of them learn another language. They learn how to teach people. They give of themselves. And they learn a great deal about the gospel, about missionary work, and about the scriptures. It seems to me that they get a lot from the experience.

I believe that being a missionary for two years saves lives. I think this because it gives people a purpose and a chance to think about someone besides themselves. If some people choose to never be missionaries, I believe some of their lives go down hill until, eventually, they hit rock bottom. By the time they reach the bottom, they probably have children who learn from them and who don't get taught what their parent learned on their mission. Those children might not stay members of the church, or, if they do, they might not be strong members and may become people who bring others down. Plus, the person at the bottom now has to work just to get themselves up to the surface: it's good that at least they are going upward, but look at how much time they lost by being selfish - what a waste of time and life!

Young people are the church's next generation. When a person chooses to be a missionary, they become a necessary member of the church because they know the gospel. Other people who don't serve missions become necessary members of the church too, but oft times it takes more than two years for them to really know the gospel.